If you want to raise a confident child, who is capable of taking his own decisions, you need to give him the freedom to become so. The key for raising independent children lies in striking a balance. You need to be patient but not too indulgent either, if you want him to be independent.
The problem with some parents is, they try to guide their children every step of the way. This is not recommended, since by doing so, you would be spoiling his ability of making choices. If you make him dependent on you, in the long run, he might get resentful and rebellious.
Top 8 Tips On How To Make Your Child Independent:
So how exactly can you make sure you hit the right balance in raising an independent child? Well, here are our top 10 tips to achieve that:
1. Create Routine:
Children need a good balance between structure and freedom that together foster independence. The more you allow him to think about himself, the more independent he will become.
- Ask your child to put away his own laundry clothes and allow him to dress on his own in the morning.
- Let him choose his snack and get his plates during mealtimes.
- Place cutlery and his clothes at lower levels, so that he can fetch them when required.
[ Read: Easy Tips For Raising Kids Right ]
2. Teach Problem-Solving Skills:
If your child has a problem, instead of rushing to save him, allow him to solve it on his own.
- Sibling rivalry is a common problem that they face at this age.
- Do not step in; rather allow him to mitigate the problem himself.
- Role playing is one of the most effective ways to develop these skills.
3. Failing Is Never Final:
There is nothing wrong in failing! Even though it may be difficult for you, allow your child to make mistakes. He will learn his lessons well this way.
- For instance, he might forget about his homework and face the consequences at school.
- It is part of the learning process that will help him remember to complete his task next time.
- Do not scold if he spilled milk while fetching his glass. Tell him how to clean up and remind him to be careful.
4. Be Empathetic:
Your child must know how much you care for him, yet you want him to solve his own problems.
- Let him know you are always there for him, no matter what.
- Gently make your child understand that you would want him to resolve the conflict by himself, rather than always seeking help from outside.
- While you should encourage him to be independent, do not allow him to hurt himself in the process!
5. Let Him Be Assertive:
Allow your child to stand for his own rights. Here is what you can do:
- If you are ordering food in a restaurant, allow him to order his own food.
- If you are dressing up, allow him to choose his own dress.
- Ask him what he would like for his snacks in the evening.
- When he would like to sit for his homework.
[ Read: Tips To Make Homework Easy For Kids ]
6. Offer Reasonable Choices:
To help your child think independently, give him reasonable choices.
- For instance, allow him to choose between pizza and pasta.
- Let him decide whether he would do the gardening first or his homework.
- Set Limitations. He must be well aware of his boundaries and know what exactly is expected of him.
7. Offer Suggestions, Not Intervention:
If you find your child struggling to find a problem, do not rush to his rescue. Instead this is what you can do:
- It is a good idea to offer guidance, not solutions.
- Allow your child to think of ways to come out of the problem.
- You may be pleasantly surprised to see how he came up with a candid solution.
[ Read: How To Build Confidence In Kids ]
8. Let Him Take Responsibilities:
If you are packing for a trip, allow your child to pack his own belongings. You can always teach him how to, the first few times.
- Include him in the trip planning process, so that your child understands all about adventure and independence.
- Ask him to carry his own luggage (or push his trolley) in the airport and bring it back home after your trip.
The whole process of being independent can be slow, but it is important that you guide your child in every move he makes. Offer him the tools necessary to grow up as successful adult.
Mothers, share with us your experience on how to make your child independent, in the comment section below.